“Impossible to see the future is.” Yoda

This is it. My first real entry.

I have absolutely no idea what to write about. While some came up with the idea for a blog within second and on a spot wrote their first post I’ve been toying with this blog for months. And here I am – not really sure what to write about. Me? My life? My passion? Work? Family? Life…?

My good friend recently proposed a blog prompt for me that went something like ‘if you could go back to 1899 and talk to anyone who would it be and what would you ask?’ I tried thinking like my fellow genealogists – “I would talk to my grandmother” or “I would save 1890 census from fire.” Me, being my usual self, I thought long and hard about that question and here’s my answer – I have no need to go back in time. I want to go into a future!

Yes, I love genealogy. Yes, I love exploring life of my ancestors. But I do love the exploration process and documents are there waiting to be discovered. I am good at what I do. I am good at what I love therefore I have no need to go back in time. I believe if it’s meant to be discovered I will discover it. If it is meant to be explored and uncovered I will explore it and uncover it. I already have success stories to tell. I want more of such. I want to experience them to the full extend with all the hardship that comes with it! That is why I love genealogy! I love discovering my ancestors’ lives and their stories and each document is just another piece of a jigsaw puzzle that makes up me! I don’t want life of my ancestors to be delivered to me on silver platter! Not that time travel is possible. But imagine you go back in time and answer all your questions about your family. Where’s the fun in that???

Where’s the process of discovering who you are and what you’re made of…?

I love the detective work that is involved in genealogy. The discovery of pieces that make up the big picture. I do call myself a “natural born detective.”

…where was I? Ah, yes, the ‘time travel’ question. Instead of going into 1899 I would love to go into 2099 or, better yet, 2199. Some 200 years into a future. My present is so unstable and so unknown that I would love to take a trip into a future and see if I’ll ever fall in love or will I ever have children and grandchildren. Who will be the informant on my death certificate? Who will be a witness on my wedding and who will hold my children to baptism? Will I even have children? I want to see if my name will be on 2020 census… Because the way things are going I’m afraid I won’t be here for it…

My ancestors already lived their lives. They already did what they were suppose to. I feel confident I’ll discover what I need about their lives on my own. I don’t feel a need to time travel. Yes, I have brick walls. Who doesn’t? But I don’t feel like those brick walls are not holding me back in any way. I see my ancestors as people who lived their lives – had jobs, got married, had kids and I am aware of their future because it is my past. All their efforts came down to creating… me. But me? I am afraid of my future. I want to know now what it holds! Now! Today! In this instance!

“I cannot teach him. The boy has no patience.”

Yoda

And so I am learning patience. I am patiently discovering my ancestors’ past that is also my past. But I am also patiently discovering my future. Future my ancestors will experience through me. They live through me and their other descendants. And it is up to me and others related to me to live, have hope, have faith and live passing on their genes and, most importantly, their spirits! So it is up to me to pass on their spirits (in form of nature and nurture) to next generations so that one day one of my descendants in 2199 will look back and say “I am who I am because my ancestors were who they were!”

I just hope to gather enough information about my ancestors and leave enough after myself so the future generations in my family will have a clear past to look at. Past without brick walls, misspelled last names, unknown places of births and uncertain stories that will cloud their research. That is my hope… The only hope I have, for now.

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